Is marriage a blessing or a curse? For many married people who are having problems with their spouse, marriage is considered “a regretful act.” Here are some important qualities of a successful marriage.
Love
Love is the most essential component in a relationship. It is the powerful force that binds two unique individuals together. A relationship will not start without love.
Support
Being a supportive spouse can be both a rewarding and a difficult role in a relationship. The most important aspect is being a loving presence always in your spouse’s life. Being supportive means strengthening the partner. You bear the weight. It is quite a responsibility for any one to take on.
Shawn came home late that night. His wife, still awake, did not even bother to ask why he looks distressed. Shawn was devastated. He thought he could share his problem to his wife. He changed into sleeping attire and went to sleep. He felt that he’s alone in the world. What do you think will happen to this kind of relationship? Will it last for a lifetime?
The sense of responsibility grows deeper when your spouse faces certain problems. To avoid conflict, respect your spouse’s personal decisions. Show that you have faith in your mate. Be the shoulder to lean on. Work together to maintain balance in your life together.
Don’t be threatened by your spouse’s accomplishments. Be proud of your spouse’s achievements. If you want to help your spouse to recover from a difficult situation, don’t try to solve it on your own.
Lisa is the big earner in the house. She’s a manager in a multinational company. Darryl is just a simple clerk. Lisa shoulders almost all expenses, except for few things that Darryl purchases for his wife. Darryl doesn’t seem to mind. Money is not a big issue in their relationship. He is very proud of his wife. He openly admits to his relative that his salary is just a quarter of Lisa’s.
Listen well. Make sure that you understand the issue.
“If you will invest time listening, you will save that time in arguments.”…Joyce Meyer
In encouraging him, be realistic. Don’t exaggerate. It will give hope.
Tolerance
The meanings of tolerance in the dictionary are:
- The power or capacity of an organism to tolerate unfavorable environmental conditions.
- A disposition to allow freedom of choice and behavior.
- The act of tolerating something.
- Willingness to recognize and respect the beliefs or practices of others.
- A permissible difference; allowing freedom to move within limits.
“Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.”------------John Quincy Adams
The given meaning has only one denominator. Patience. Without it, the word tolerance is nothing.
Always remember that it pays to be patient. As the saying goes, patience is a virtue.
Communication
All arguments can be solved through proper communication. If your partner annoys you for things he or she has done consciously or unconsciously, approach your spouse. Talk to each other. Explain that you are offended by that act. Remember that he or she can’t read minds. Don’t try to keep it inside. It will corrupt you. The annoyance will grow in your heart. Don’t wait for it to burst one day. As early as possible discuss the problem with your spouse.
Gary has been irritated recently by the way Anna welcomes the guest to their house. Instead of telling Anna about his irritation, Gary decided to keep his mouth shut. Anna, knowing nothing about his husband’s irritation, continues to act that way. After some time when Gary could no longer contain himself, suddenly slaps Anna in the face. Anna, caught by surprise, couldn’t believe her husband’s irrational act.
If only Gary told Anna beforehand, such lousy act will not happen. Gary assumed that Anna knows he’s somewhat irritated. Perhaps he tried to show his nuisance but failed because Anna is busy entertaining visitors that moment. If a certain thing bothers you, tell it straight to your spouse. It doesn’t hurt to be straightforward. It is just a choice of words on how you will express yourself.
